Have you ever wondered why one kid may be more resilient than another? Let’s say Lisa and Jenny are students in the same eighth grade math class. They both struggle during the quarter and, in the end, they both receive low final grades. Upon hearing the news, Lisa and Jenny share myriad negative emotions. However,…
I wanted to sleep with a bat under my pillow. It was plastic; nonetheless, it was a weapon. I was five years old, and I firmly believed that each night when I went to sleep, a robber would break into the house. I needed something to defend myself (and maybe my family), and my brother’s…
Growing up, I was a bit of a firecracker. I reacted quickly to situations and never hesitated to express my “passionate” opinions. This often led to hurt feelings. I remember once, after a heated discussion with my brother, he asked my parents to put a coffee filter over my mouth to “keep the yucky stuff inside.” My…
At some point, children with anxiety want to understand why they are suffering from persistent worry. Try walking your child through this infographic. Kids love to learn that worry actually has a very specific purpose: protection. Sometimes this protection mechanism can go a little haywire, but there are ways to come back from the frenetic…
“What if I don’t get asked to the dance?” “What if you run out of gas and can’t pick me up from school?”“What if we get robbed?” “What if… [insert your child’s anxious thought here]?” If your child’s anxious, it’s likely they do something I like to call what-iffing. This is the tendency to ponder…
It took me over two decades of dealing with chronic worry to learn there is no one-size-fits-all-magic-pill solution for anxiety. I’ve also learned, however, there are research-based methods that do work well for many people (including children) in a variety of situations. For long-term relief, I always recommend cognitive behavioral techniques to manage worry. For short-term…
Sixth grade history was a tough subject for me. Anytime Mr. Brown asked a question, I desperately averted my eyes or doodled in my notebook to look busy. Once in a while he called on me anyway. That triggered my anxiety: “What if I get the answer wrong?” “What if everyone laughs at me?” “What if……
One of the most powerful techniques to manage child anxiety is something I learned from a man named Chesley. Chesley loved planes. The first time he ever saw a plane speeding down the runway and rising off the ground, he was awestruck. Chelsey was five years old and he knew right then and there he had to have…
“It’s thin,” she said with a barely perceptible crack in her voice. I was on the phone with Jilly, my best friend from high school. Her voice always cracked a bit right before she was going to cry. We’d both been anxiously awaiting responses to the college applications we’d sent out earlier that year. Before…
As all the kids line up to go to school, your son, Timmy, turns to you and says, “I don’t want to take the bus. My stomach hurts. Please don’t make me go.” You cringe and think, Here we go again. What should be a simple morning routine explodes into a daunting challenge. You look at…